How Does Chronic Pain Affect Relationships?
Dec 09, 2022 By Madison Evans

When you have chronic pain, it is present when you start waking up and when you go to sleep. Your relationship may suffer as you and your partner try to comprehend one other's experiences of the constant anguish that follows you around. A variety of female-specific illnesses and disorders may cause chronic pain. A total of 4 million Americans have fibromyalgia, according to the CDC's estimates (most women). It's not uncommon for women to hear comments like "the agony is all in your brain," which they and their spouses may internalize. When one spouse doesn't realize how much another hurts, it may strain the relationship.

Relationships

Everyone, from conception to death, is looking for some community to feel at home (research link). This could be due to the idea that there is strength in numbers, the fact that we experience a sense of belonging when we are with those who are similar to us, the belief that interacting with those who are different from us broadens our horizons or the simple fact that we find it easier to deal with adversity when we have others to lean on. Relationships, such as those with family, friends, coworkers, and romantic partners, are important for our health and happiness for various reasons (study link). According to the findings of several scientific studies, being socially isolated significantly increases the danger of contracting any illness, whether physiological or psychological.

Chronic Pain And Relationships

For years, Tom Hanks's character has been stranded on an island by himself in the film Cast Away. The only other person he ever spoke to was a volleyball he called Wilson. When this inanimate thing is lost, the owner experiences the same profound sense of loss that any of us would feel at the prospect of being left alone. The burden of dealing with the pain's effects on one's body, mind, and spirit falls squarely on the individual experiencing it. Those on the sidelines are sometimes left powerless as they determine how best to assist. Both parties' expectations of a full recovery increase with each new therapy and session, only to be dashed by the reality of continued discomfort. Constant, unrelenting pain that cannot be alleviated by conventional medical means is, by definition, a medical condition. They are named "pain management" because they are used to treat the symptoms underlying chronic pain rather than the cause. Many individuals who deal with chronic pain report that it has a profound effect on their relationships. Numerous factors, such as:

  • Lack of education on the effects of chronic pain
  • Misconceptions concerning the permanence and intractable nature of pain
  • There is a growing phenomenon known as emotional exhaustion due to the relentlessness of suffering.
  • Discomfort-induced shifts in tasks and roles
  • Alterations in a person's physical, emotional, and mental health as a result of chronic pain
  • Alterations to the well-being of the individual who is not in constant discomfort

Strengthening The Bonds Of Your Relationships

Fibromyalgia, back problems, arthritis, and other chronic pain conditions may negatively impact relationships if one spouse is doubtful about the cause or intensity of the pain. In contrast, others think they aren't getting the right understanding and support. Spokane's own Gonzaga University's Annmarie Cano, Ph.D., dean of the department of arts and sciences but instead professor of psychology, says that those with chronic diseases value the affection and support of their friends and family. Everyone needs to be loved as well as cared for, but when the people closest to them aren't providing for them, they may feel entitled to that love and care.

Conclusion

Everyone with chronic pain understands how challenging it can be to do even the most basic of everyday tasks, yet those closest to you may not realize how challenging it is. Living with chronic pain is difficult and may also significantly impact your relationships with the people in your life. So that chronic pain doesn't drive a wedge between you and your loved ones, it's crucial to work together. When dealing with chronic pain, talking things through is the greatest approach to keep tensions from rising in close friendships and partnerships. Nobody will ever find out if you keep your feelings bottled up within. Encourage others around you to empathize with your situation by explaining how you feel as well as asking for support. Instead of pushing people away even though they don't understand your grief, if they know where and when to assist, it might strengthen your connection.